Female sexual problems:
What is defined as a good Sexual health?
SEXUAL HEALTH: Sexual health, as defined by WHO, is a state of complete physical, mental, social, and psychological well-being, not merely absence of disease, dysfunction or infirmity, in all aspects related to sex life.
Reproductive health means that people can have a satisfying sex life and give birth whenever they decide, and that female can pass through pregnancy, labor, and puerperium safely and have a healthy baby.
Exactly as men’s, women’s sexual health is very important to ensure emotional and physical stability and well-being.
Women may feel embarrassed to talk about their sexual needs and problems to their lovers, which can make things worse!.
Statistics show that only in 29% of sexual intercourses, women reach orgasm and in about 80% of all cases, they’re faking it.
Solving sexual problems requires talking about them, which can be difficult…
and embarrassing for women…that’s exactly where meeting a sexologist can make all the difference
Do women and men differ in how they view sex?
Men may think that women seek sexual intercourse for the same reason they do, which is a fulfillment of physical needs,
But there is a catch…
Researchers proved that for females, the primary motivation for sex is emotional; women tend to have sex to feel safer and closer to their partners and to share their feeling.
On the other hand, most men find their ultimate pleasure in orgasm, for women sexual arousal that fulfills her emotional needs alone can be described as satisfactory.
If a female suffers from anorgasmia (which is defined as a failure or difficulty in reaching orgasm) or frigidity (low sexual desire), the problem doesn’t have to be something exclusively with her!…
….as it may arise from a sexual disorder with the male partner, like premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, or from the quality of the sexual intercourse.
It takes two persons to have a healthy sexual relationship, and both partners should cooperate to achieve it, this is exactly why a consultation with a sexologist is very important to solve sexual problems and attain true sexual fulfillment.
How can a Sexologist help in solving sexual health problems and/or Sex issues?
A well-trained Sexologist can help both partners open up to each other and be feel comfortable to talk freely about their sexual needs, desires, and expectations.
Your sex therapist will help you to identify your problem and its root causes and will work with you on it by sex education, correction of false beliefs, facilitation of communication between you and your partner.
Sex home assignments given by the sexologist can give you all the skills you need to deal with your intimate issues
What are the causes of female sexual problems?
There many causes and risk factors for female sexual problems, the following are the commonest cause of female sexual problems…
- Continuous conflicts with the partner
- Mismatched sex drives.
- Unsuitable partner performance
- Fatigue and exhaustion
- Systemic diseases (as diabetes, thyroid over or under function, liver or heart diseases).
- Side effects of some medications
- Lack of sex education
- Sexual identity problems
- Excessive life stresses
- Bad past sexual experience
- Scars, past infections, inflammation in the female genital region
What are the most common female sexual problems?
Many female sexual disorders, like the inability to reach orgasm, nonacceptance of one’s body, unsatisfying sexual intercourse or loss of sexual desire, require consultation with a sexologist to explore the causes and decide how they should be managed.
Here are the most common women’s sexual disorders
Anorgasmia is defined as the difficulty or inability of reaching orgasm or climax after normal sexual stimulation. Interestingly..
…It occurs in patients who have had no sex education, inexperience, anxiety and other psychological stresses, bad past sexual experience, or due to side effects of some medications or complications of systemic diseases.
Sometimes the reason of anorgasmia is unknown (idiopathic). Anorgasmia causes frustration, vascular engorgement, heavy pelvic sensation, and restlessness.
A Sexologist can help a female with anorgasmia by sex education on how to respond and interact with sexual stimulation, guidance to find what works for her best and application of methods of distraction during intercourse like erotic music and videos that provide more relaxation.
Sometimes anorgasmia can occur as a result of residual beliefs that consider female sexual desire to be “wrong”, in such cases cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) can be applied by the sexologist to identify and change the patterns of problematic thinking that cause the problem.
Frigidity also called low libido :-
Frigidity is abnormal decreased or loss of sexual desire. Low libido can be a temporarily a normal reaction to some life stresses, hormonal imbalance or psychic traumas, but when it extends to long periods of time preventing a couple from having healthy intercourse, frigidity has to be managed by a specialist.
A sexologist can help you identify the deep psychological and emotional causes. Difficulties in the bedroom usually originate from conflicts and frustrations outside the bedroom, your sexologist will help you and your partner reach a point where your conflicts no longer affect your sex life.
Frigidity can occur secondarily to premature ejaculation with the male partner, which drives the female to lower her expectations through lowering her sex desire.
Dyspareunia is abnormal pain during sexual intercourse. Pain during intercourse usually indicates local infection, cysts or some degree of pathology in that region that require medical and/or surgical intervention.
Dyspareunia can also be caused by insufficient lubrication as a result of lack of adequate foreplay, hormonal disturbance, old age or adverse effects of medications. Many cases of dyspareunia either occur to emotional and psychological reasons.
If you feel pain during intercourse that affects the quality of your sex life, you should visit a physician to exclude organic causes. After the initial checkup, usually, your physician will refer you to a sexologist who teach you how to avoid the pain and how to communicate with your partner about it.
Mismatched sex drives :-
One of the most common reasons why couples visit sexologists is a mismatch of their sexual desires and fantasies, where one partner is into sex much more or less than the other, or one partner enjoys a specific sex act while the other doesn’t welcome it.
If you don’t feel into sex as your partner does, it may be because you’ve so much closeness, having some time alone can help bring up your desire again. A sex therapist can help you both to welcome each other differences and learn how to deal with them
Sexual Aversion Disorder :-
Sexual aversion is a desire disorder characterized by extreme avoidance of almost all genital sexual contact leading to interpersonal difficulty and stress.
It is common in females with a history of sexual abuse or those who were taught that female sexual desire is “wrong” and sex for them was taboo.
Cognitive behavior therapy by an experienced sexologist can change the incorrect beliefs that lead to this abnormal behavior. Your sex therapist will help you get it off your chest so it does not restrain you anymore.
The Lover who cheated :-
Emotional trauma after finding out that your lover cheated on you can be huge. Usually, cheating is unforgivable and causes separation, and when you decide to forgive and move on with your partner, you find it extremely difficult to, as the quote says :
In such cases, a help from a sexologist is indispensable to deal with the problem, resume your sex life and move on with your relationship. A good Sexologist will recommend that the partner who cheated should accept to all his secrets and details about his sex life and other affairs to his partner.
Opening up and being honest and upfront about the relationship may be just the right thing to do in times of a crisis.
Having a healthy talk about what’s going on with your sexual life is a key factor for making it better and healthier. If you find it hard to reach orgasm, had a bad past experience that obstacles your sex life, don’t feel into sex anymore or feel stressed, then visiting a sexologist may be just the right thing to do
Female sexual problems no matter how severe can be honestly sorted and treated with the right treatment strategy.
If you are suffering from a female sexual problem, and if you need help just fill in the form below and get in touch with us!
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Meet Dr. Shah at the Male Infertility & Sexual health Clinic
Dr. Shah is Consultant Andrologist and Sexologist in Chennai. His passion for helping men facing infertility issues stems from the fact that “Men never ever get the care they deserve as far as fertility treatments is concerned”